|Trying to get a glimpse of some place other than where we are.|
There are some things that cannot be reconnoitered. Such as the future, our futures, what comes next. Even with the most imaginative homemade device we will not be able to see around that particular corner.
In another lifetime I consulted psychics, astrologers. I thought they could, for varying fees, apply their periscopes to my unseen destiny and assure me that all I hoped for would come to pass. Eventually I realized it was just so much piffle. They couldn't tell me and I no longer wanted to know.
It is not difficult to envision that most of us are familiar with expanses, jagged and bleak, from which we'd rather escape. What better destination than a promised tomorrow where all is bliss. I know addiction, dissociation, torpor, depression and despair. The great miracle is that they are no longer chronic states. Their shadowy overhang once kept sunlight from the garden, that is different now.
Time and love, that of self and others, carry us beyond our grimmest days. It is work and it is worth it. As much as I craved the assurance of peace to come, I would never have believed anyone who described this path to me. Or maybe they did and because it seemed so unlikely I simply forgot. As it feels the most accurate name for them, I swear there are angels, fierce angels, who take up our cause, especially when it feels lost. Once we recognize all life as an act of faith, we become our own seers.