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| Trying to get a glimpse of some place other than where we are. |
There are some things that cannot be reconnoitered. Such as the future, our futures, what comes next. Even with the most imaginative homemade device we will not be able to see around that particular corner.
In another lifetime I consulted psychics, astrologers. I thought they could, for varying fees, apply their periscopes to my unseen destiny and assure me that all I hoped for would come to pass. Eventually I realized it was just so much piffle. They couldn't tell me and I no longer wanted to know.
It is not difficult to envision that most of us are familiar with expanses, jagged and bleak, from which we'd rather escape. What better destination than a promised tomorrow where all is bliss. I know addiction, dissociation, torpor, depression and despair. The great miracle is that they are no longer chronic states. Their shadowy overhang once kept sunlight from the garden, that is different now.
Time and love, that of self and others, carry us beyond our grimmest days. It is work and it is worth it. As much as I craved the assurance of peace to come, I would never have believed anyone who described this path to me. Or maybe they did and because it seemed so unlikely I simply forgot. As it feels the most accurate name for them, I swear there are angels, fierce angels, who take up our cause, especially when it feels lost. Once we recognize all life as an act of faith, we become our own seers.
5 comments:
Oh, I am so with you. I don't know how many times I've given away my 'new agey', psychic books. It was fun at the time, but practicality and gratitude have taken over I look for joy in all its forms
Kass - I look back, wonder and can only assume that the present, then, was too unbearable. Gratitude is an enduring companion. Joy in all its forms, and there are so many. xo
I was grateful for the new age literature - it often seemed to be that which most resonnated with me when those closest to me seemed strangers. It allowed me to grow in ways I had not always envisaged, mainly because I couldn't see that I needed to grow. So I see it as a gift of its time, just as I now see the awakening of compassion and community a gift for these times. With respect to Kass's nod to practicality and thank-full-ness, they have been lifelong companions which have helped, along with my spiritual beliefs, in desperately painful times.
Marylinn, I've stumbled on your blog this evening and reiterate the 'Hear, hear!' of the previous writer.
Thankyou, thankyou. Jocelyn
Jocelyn - Thank you. When we can speak of our experiences in ways that don't bemoan them but don't deny them either, I think perhaps we arrive at new places of courage. I am still a novice at practicing continual thankfulness. It is unlike anything else. I am so glad that you found your way here to this post. What is our purpose if not to make each others' lives better? We bring what we have and trust it will find its way. Thank you for writing. xo
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